How to They/Them

August 1, 2020
Well-rounded guidelines for considerately traversing the ever evolving gender spectrum. In their insightful manual, genderqueer author and filmmaker Getty and queer designer and illustrator Thyng educate readers on the particulars of gender and grammatically correct pronoun selection. They also simulate what life presents for "GNC folks" (Gender Nonconforming) and the challenges they may face. Getty begins by sharing their own unique history, an opener that sets the humorously educative tone for the remainder of the book. Raised in Kentucky, they were born Kate, who was constantly aware of feeling "not quite female, not quite male." In adulthood, Getty adopted their middle name, Stuart, as a proper name. As Getty "grew into knowing myself, the less I used Kate," embracing being "weird" as a display of personal growth and expressive liberty. The author briskly and perceptively reviews the basics of nonbinary gender pronouns, describing their evolutionary timeline, meanings, and the often complex concepts of sex assigned at birth, gender identity, and sexual orientation. Getty also examines the specificities of social appropriateness and the importance of polite consideration for both adults and children. They address how to avoid "gender-clocking" and inappropriate curiosity about someone's "junk," hints on recognizing contextual clues, recovering from a conversational "slip," how to calmly discuss preferences with loved ones, and public bathroom etiquette. Getty's pleasantly entertaining instruction is complemented by Thyng's simple, effective pen-and-ink illustrations. Together, the text and illustrations cleverly accentuate themes spanning the gender spectrum, including methods of immediate support for the trans movement. Readers shouldn't let the narrative's lighthearted take on the subject belie its significance nor its urgency within the context of contemporary society. Focused on transparency and honesty, Getty and Thyng dispense critical information on identity and promote understanding and acceptance for those seeking freedom of expression and personal presentation. Straightforward, practical, relevant navigation through the radiant world of gender fluidity.

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August 1, 2020
Getty grew up as a tomboy in Kentucky, and when they started using "they" pronouns, it felt weird. But then the weirdness of it felt right, and that deeply felt journey (and their Kentucky politeness) seems to have prepared them to write this clear, kind guide to gender nonconformity. Getty explores the history of gender-neutral pronouns (which appeared as early as 1375), and how people can convince naysayers that the singular "they" is neither new nor a big deal. They break down the difference between Sex Assigned at Birth (SAAB), gender identity, and gender orientation, importantly explaining that even hormones and chromosomes don't work on a clear binary. The book also covers interactions: how to ask people for their pronouns, what to do when you mess up, and how to respond to anti-genderqueer rhetoric. Getty's cheeky tone and the punchy black-and-white illustrations by Brooke Thyng make this book a useful reference for anyone with questions about gender, whether their own or those they witness in the larger world, and a resource that belongs in all public-library collections.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2020, American Library Association.)

September 1, 2020

Language can be complicated. It can become ingrained in our psyche and feel immutable, so how do you convince family, friends, or yourself to include gender-neutral language? With this book, Getty (genderqueer public speaker and filmmaker) has created an easy-to-read introduction to nonbinary pronouns, and to the world between and beyond the gender binary. They start with the basic basics--what is gender, how is it different from sex, what is gender expression--and move on to how to use they/them and other gender-neutral terms (spouse/offspring/Mx./etc.). The language used to explain terms is simplified and accessible, making it easy for all to understand. Getty inserts humor, relatable interactions, and their personal experiences to bring the why of nonbinary language to the forefront. Illustrations by Thyng add creativity and clarity. VERDICT Designed to be both a guide for those actively seeking more inclusive language and a useful gift for people who are uncertain regarding they/them pronouns, this book is more lighthearted than Dennis Baron's What's Your Pronoun? As an essential Q&A guide to gender identity, it deserves attention.--Ahliah Bratzler, Indianapolis P.L.

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